Friday, August 24, 2012

Catching Up On My Summer and Promises of Future Posts

So you know there is another new post that I put up just about an hour before this one, so you don't miss it.

I apologize to any loyal readers I had for not posting since around the end of school. I simply found myself blanking out about it or staring at the screen without inspiration. Now I will attempt to sum up my summer so far. Though it won't be in order.

1.) I am now armed! Yes the already potentially dangerous ginger bought a bow. It is a lovely left handed recurved bow I got at Cabela's. I attempted to draw it, though my paint skills still aren't amazing. I will probably take a picture though and put it up as well... eventually. Oh and I also bought a dozen arrows (obviously).

2.) I got my text books! They are heavy. So heavy I am going to run up and weigh them and come back to tell you how much they weigh. And the total is: 26.5 pounds. And that is just my textbooks. I still need to get binders and what not. Did I mention they ripped almost all of the lockers out of my high school? Seniors get priority and unless the teachers have extra sets of textbooks for in class (sometimes they do sometimes they don't) then I will be carrying around a bare minimum of 26.5 pounds of textbooks around school all day.
I really don't want to have to carry five textbooks around. But I might have to along with the rest of the populace.
My other two text books are Precalculus with limits and a Biology textbook. 
 
Since I am a cheater by posting actual pictures of the covers for the last two I will draw a dragonfly and add it to the next post. I am racing to finish this one before I am sent off to bed because I am afraid I will forget about it and then it will go unposted forever and a day.
And now I just remembered I actually have two MORE textbooks. Though they are the size of novels and together are roughly 700 pages.

3.) I did an Honors Chem class over the summer
This will actually get it's own super amazin post but I will give you a few topics I will cover
a) Tri-Iodide bombs
b) Molarity
c) various explosions
d) my awesome references in my lab report
e) my scientific conclusion that Duck is acidic
Please bug me with comments or emails if I have not posted about this by September.

4.) Turned Fifteen
Yep I've been fifteen for a couple months now... And my birthday was amazing except for Duck and Solar not being able to come to my party because they were out of town. I also need reminders to write a post about the party.

This post is slowly turning into a to do list. Therefore I am going to publish it now before it goes even more down hill.
One quick last note: I'm going to Deception Pass Star Party in a little over two weeks! Yeah!



Chapter One

I have returned!
Well I have not posted in quite some time. I have no idea if anyone has come on recently or if anyone actually reads anything I post. So if you want me to continue this or come by and read a comment would be super appreciated... even if it's just hey, I read your post!
So I have been writing again and have a chapter ready for something I am working on. Thus I am posting it here, hoping for feedback. I haven't decided on a title yet, though it may be an extention of Out Of Sync.
Without further a do, I give you the first chapter!
Chapter One
The Epilogue – Silent Streets, Flashes of Green, and A Mysterious Package
All was quiet on Elm’s street, save for the white noise that its people had come to block out. The low drumming of machinery hummed along with the warm raspy voice of the last summer winds. The sun was barely beginning to glint over the lay of the land. All was as it should be. It was an uneventful street in a beautifully dull town, just beyond the edge of a metal empire.
On the corner was an ancient red brick house where a tired old man kept the discarded oddities of past eras, hoping that one day they might be of value. He did not mind the idea that none of his hoarded ‘treasures’ may ever bring in any sort of profit. If anything he’d much rather have them to entertain his imagination in the time he had left, and keep him from turning to the ‘advancements’ of his own time.
He’d been up late the past night working on a piece of clockwork, fascinated by the functionality of the gears that also in themselves were pieces of art. It was no wonder to him that not long ago steam punk and the likes had been so popular… Now of course, they had gotten so close to the science fiction of the past that people had forgotten about such things. It had been that same thought that he’d last had before he had nodded off and the gear slipped out of his hand.
Outside the window the breeze picked up into a ferocious gust and then in an instant dissipated in a flash of green light. A tall wispy figured girl stood where the flash had been centered, eyes tightly closed and breathe held, her face in an expression that was excited but at the same time deathly scared. With a hesitant and hooked sigh she slowly opened her eyes and reached for the door handle. It opened of its own accord.
At the work table the man woke with a start, and looked up as the automatic door swung open. His pulse quickened as he tried to recall… Oh yes, he was supposed to be looking at something for one of the Jones’ that morning. His eyes scanned the table and then went back to look at the clock. What was this?! It wasn’t even five in the morning.
“Your early you know. It isn’t even a proper hour to consider existing, much less living.” He let off a slight chuckle, a little more than disconcerted that he had yet to get a response.
 With an ‘oomph’ and a bit of effort he lifted himself from his desk chair and went to investigate for himself. If those damn birds had set off the door again…
“Yes I figured it would be early, but then on time would be too late in the scheme of things.”
The plump man stumbled and then stopped in his tracks. Even being the recluse he was, he still had managed to make the acquaintance of everyone in the tiny settlement. This voice did not belong to any of the Jones’ and neither was it one that he had ever heard before. But people did not simply show up on Elm’s street, people had a place these days and there wasn’t much that could change that.
“I have something for you to care for, and a message. Well I don’t have all of the thing I need you to care for, but the rest of it will make its way here soon enough. Please don’t be shy; I’ve come ever so long.” The voice was distinctly feminine with the way it seemed to almost laugh, but had deeper undertones that turned it from a sickly sweet sound to a richly smooth one.
The woman’s footsteps drew closer and with a breath he stepped around the corner, determined to greet her rather than have her search him out.
“Oh, there you are, Arthur Dowlen. I was beginning to think I had ended up outside the wrong shop, which would have been most embarrassing.”
“How do you know my name?” confusion was plastered on his face and echoed in his voice.
“Arthur Dowlen, the real question should be ‘why am I here’. Anyone could come here having learned your name. They could have any number of reasons, whether they be wanting a joke or trying to impress you. But I am the only one who brings something to your care. Rarely does anyone come here to buy Mr. Dowlen, and never has anyone had anything to sell. I freely offer. So the question is ‘what am I hiding inside my jacket?’”
Without waiting for him to ask the right questions or even give a response to her eerie remarks she unbuttoned the heavy coat and took out a thick stack of papers tied off with some thin twine. Taking a few brisk steps towards the closest table she pulled out a pocket knife and slit the twine, letting the documents slide apart and onto the wooden surface.
There were all sorts of shapes and sizes, from notecards, to legal size sheets to prescription stationary. Some were crisp and others crumpled, and from the dye they were colored with to the array of stains they were their own filthy sort of rainbow. The only thing that linked them all was the scratchy handwritten notes that filled every open space, and each one with its own number, rewritten in every corner.
Arthur let out a gasp at the sight. It was rare to see anything handwritten nowadays but even if it was common it would still shock him to see all this. So much effort had gone into these carefully guarded sheets, and he could see where tears had fallen and dried into the paper. It was a hard labor and certainly a hard story, all belonging to a girl who looked to young and innocent to have ever truly hurt. How deceiving looks are.
“What is all this?” he said gruffly, gesturing wildly with a finger at the menagerie of ink and parchment.
“A mere trifle, a brief glimpse of a story and a mere caress compared to the agonizing full truth and pain. I need you to keep it safe for me, it will mean nothing if it does not survive.” Her eyes were sorrowful but resolute, and a shiver went down her spine.
“What must I do?” He answered without hesitation; there was no way he would think to deny her.
For a moment she stood silent, as if debating whether or not it was safe to go through with her plan.
“Within a year one similar to myself will appear as I have but with a very different circumstance. He will be injured and close to death, I beg that you don’t let him die.” He could see her fighting back sobs and trying to seem withdrawn by keeping her voice cold. She couldn’t stop it from hitching up at the end though.
She looked down for a moment then forced herself to lift her head back up, looking to face him and refusing to hide the tears. After a quick breath she continued.
“I need you to read these papers before he comes so you might understand, but tell no one of them or their contents. There are lives that depend on the safety of the package that you will pass on, you must understand that.
“Once you have ensured his stability you will allow him to read the papers, and then you will need to supply him paper and ink so that he may write a letter that will be enclosed with the papers I am now entrusting you with. Soon after he will leave you, but before he does he will give to you a relic of years passed, a silver pendant and chain with a celtic knot.
“These three things - these papers, his papers, and the necklace- must then  be wrapped in a parcel paper and marked with the same celtic knot as the pendant,” to emphasize her meaning she pulled back out her pocket knife and etched the figure into the table top; a circle in four quarters with a full circle woven through it. “And is to also state that it is not to be open until 2456, which will be sufficient enough for it to reach the intended recipient. Will you continue to accept this task?”
“It would be my honor child.” He reached to help scoop up the papers and she caught his outstretched hand and dropped a tiny clockwork blue jay into his fingers that she had kept hidden.
“You asked for no compensation, take this as a gift, she had no place in my pocket hidden away from human eyes. Don’t try and argue with me about it, I’ll just leave it on the table if I have to, and I’d much prefer you freely accept her.”
His fingers delicately surrounded the delicate metal bird and he brought it up close to examine.
“Thank you, you’ve given me something to occupy some time. And I’m always happy to help a lady.”
“It’s you who ought to be thanked, Arthur Dowlen. It is you who is going to be instrumental in saving my life.”
She left him with that last sweetly spoken sentence. Her eyes flew shut and as if in a faint she started to collapse, but in a flash of green she was gone before she could hit the ground.

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Ninja



(Probably not our Destiny... though she is pretty Ninja.)

This doesn't have any real point. Well the star has five points but yeah... something cool needs to happen now.... any moment now... I"M WAITING!

Response to Spam Callers

They've found us again and wiggled through our security system... ITS THE UNKNOWN NUMBER SPAMMERS!!!!!!!!!! The called twice in the last five minutes. If they call again I will be sorely tempted to answer and mess with them.

#1- Yes, I'd like a large original crust pizza with grilled chicken, red and green bell peppers, tomatoe, onion, and absolutely no mushrooms.
****I'm calling to speak to*
Look, I don't care who you called for, you got me, and I'm the one ordering here.
****We are not a pizzaria*
Well you should be and why on earth did you call then, don't you understand that I am really craving a pizza that looks somewhat healthy on top even if its destined to bring my demise?!!!
****I told you we don't make pizzas! Please give the phone to...*
(in a whisper/whine) Can you please make me a pizza anyways?
*CLICK*

#2- Hello, what is the nature of your call? If you are in a life or death situation please hang up and call 911. If you want to speak with the one who pays the phone bill please press one.
*1*
I'm sorry I didn't catch that. Please wait until all options are expressed before choosing a number so we can serve you as best as possible.
If you would like to speak to the one who pays the phone bill press one.
If you want to talk to Elvis Presley then you are out of luck. If you want to talk to a delusional woman who thinks she is Elvis Presley, Press 2.
If you would like to prance through the clouds like a little pony and live inside a house made of cheese on the moon, or already are doing so Press 3 and we will connect you to the Psych ward.
If you like long walks on the beach, have a kind heart, and frequently dance in the rain press 4 and we will connect you to your dream person.
If you are a heinous criminal then Press 5. We will connect you you to a criminal lawyer who will turn you into the police for his own nefarious purposes.
If you have a name starting with the letter Z or X press 6 immediately. You will get through immediately. We have been expecting you.
If you are getting tired of this hang up... I am too so I suppose it doesn't matter what you want anymore so I'm going to hang up...

#3- *Ring.... Ring*
Hello... can I talk to Robert Mueller please, he's there right. I think he's got the wrong email he keeps telling me I've won millions... Maybe you're the real winner....

#4- I will yell at them in German... and probably call them a donut.... then yell some random spanish words... a few faky french-ish words... and then say dingo dog. After that I'll just hang up.

#5- Is this Destiny?
*nooooo*
Wellll I'm sort of waiting for Destiny to come calling so I kind of need you to stop calling so I don't miss the call. It's kind of important.... Well cheers mate!

#6- All is revealed! Flee the city! (then the line goes dead)

#7- I'm sorry sir but I've grown up to abide by the idea that one should always choose the lesser of two weevils. Unfortunately for you your a pretty big weevil. But if you call back I'll let you know if I've found a bigger one!

And I'm done for now.....................................................................................................................
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Friday, June 29, 2012

Proof I'm Bored

739 days left in the countdown - Day 18 of the blog - 9 days til my birthday - 2nd Post today

I said the following in an IM conversation... it needs no explanation.

Chelsea.... sleep speakie with me
or I will nom on ya cupcakes
and lives insade ya micro fuzz junky

***Of course you want an explanation anyways... she make plushy and I threaten to eat her plushy cupcake and live in the bag of fluffeh stuff. ***


Fine you can have a picture.

Yes this post is pathetic... I don't care.

Spammers Beware!

I have seriously considered replying to scammers/spammers just to mess with them. I'm sure some of you at least have thought the same. I mean, wouldn't it be fun to reply to a nigerian scam with another nigerian scam... or when you get an email allegedly from the "FBI" reply by saying that you thought you were Robert Mueller? So I figured that since I have a few minutes to kill and am in the mindset I would write a couple that probably will never be sent. Below will be those letters, with pictures (of course they wouldn't get the pictures because they might steal them). Oh and I even made it authentic with grammatical and spelling errors.

Mr and/or Mrs. Insert your name here,
I have a matter of utmost importence to discuss with you. By now you may have realized the absence of your soul. We sent a ninja to steal it for us. If you want to ever get it back you must pay us the sum of $30,000,000,001, thirty billion and one united states dollars. This amount must be in pennies and left in Kickapoo, Arizona next to the bar. You must then scream the words "Dingo Dog" at the top of your lungs and then return to your dwelling. We will be watching. Once you have complated these steps you may apply for the return of your soul which if not in stock will be replaced by something of equal or greater value. The aplication form is below.
Name:
Age:
Gender:
Social Security #:
Credit Score:
father's Maiden Name:
The name of the current ruler of New Dehli:
The exact number of people on earth at 3:59am eastern time on July 22, 1643:

Have a nice day, and keep in touch,
                        Frederico Expresso Darrlington Enigaldo Xenith
(by the way I own fedex... you can tell by my initials!)

If you have one of those names above, I mean no disrespect. They were the first ones that popped in my head when I was trying to spell Fedex......

I think its clear that I have just a little too much time on my hands....

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

The Colors - Orange

742 days left in countdown - day 15 of the blog - 12 days until my birthday

Today I feel like narrating some more of the colors since I'm stuck inside for the moment. The rain has been coming in waves, soaking the earth then tapering down to a halt while it regains strength. I've always loved the rain, and I get plenty of it here in Washington. Something about those cascading droplets leaving the sky and returning to the earth has always felt so right. They are like the bond between the land and the sky, nurturing both through the balance between them.
I was going to talk about the colors... thats right. I think for now I'll just do orange (well orange and also sunsets which I know go far beyond orange) and green.

Duck, those white lines were purposeful and I promise they were not done in spite.
Orange and Sunset
When I was younger there was this boy who always used to ask me why my hair was so orange. Turns out the guy was a genius because he started running start while the rest of us went into junior high. Now we're in high school and he's a ways into college. At least that's what I've been told... I haven't seen him, much less talked to him, in years. Every time I hear his name I think of the darling kindargartener puzzling over ginger hair.
Orange also reminds me, of course, of oranges. The smell as someone tears the peel back and little one particles spray into the air. The explosion of taste that comes as teeth pierce the translucent skin that holds tight around the pulp. Yummy citrus.
Then there are sunsets. If you haven't seen a sunset then you should. Get above the trees and out of the labyrinth of the city if they consume the horizon. The sun has set on my life 5467 times on my life and I wish I had seen more of those sunsets than I have taken the time to witness.
One sunset stands out in my mind vividly. The air was cool and evening was creeping over the mountain. It was a typical summer for us, we came up there every year with friends to escape the city lights and structures so we could spend our nights under the stars and our days among the trees and tall grasses. This particular visit we had finally decided to all hike together the short half mile to a rock overhang with an amazing view of where the sun would dip down to meet the horizon. We showed up a few minutes early and situated ourselves among the rocks, staring over the cliff and talking as the sun inched ever closer.
It's like magic as that golden orb touches the horizon and the clouds and sky explode with color. I look back at these words and none of them measure up. There are just some things that we don't have words for, things you have to experience to understand even if there were words. I think I'll leave it at that.

***later today as I have finally returned to finish this***
Orange is a cool night gazing at the flames as friends gather around a campfire. Hey I wrote a metaphor....

I think I am going to put green in a seperate post... my brain has decided that I must escape from my blog for a while... I think I'll go running or something... probably will do the green post tomorrow.